Apeshit

I'm John, I'm Major Domo
Of the tribe of Homo Saps:
Our brain waves may be slo-mo,
But we're decent Tory chaps.

We sprang from the primeval,
From the very source of slime,
When wallop and upheaval
Knocked the stuffing into Time.

And every waking hour
Is spent practising our creed:
The classlessness of power.
We're very good indeed.

Each treetop peroration
Names our near relations 'pals'.
We're all of us One Nation
(Except Neanderthals).

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From the book Tony Blair reminds me of a budgie

Dismissing Lady Thatcher's attack upon 'One Nation' Conservativism, John Major said, "We have been a One Nation Conservative Party since the beginning of time."